Friday, September 23, 2005

Rambles

I feel that my middle of the road journey is so all over the place. I want my rambles to come off with some sort of help and insight. But being all over the place is where I am. I am all over the place with my thoughts. I have good days, and some not so good days. Have any of you had those 'not so good days'? They can be ugly.

I so wish I can start all over and begin with clarity but if you know me now in the middle and also knew me at the beginning you can attest that I am not the same. If you look at me up close I am for sure not the same. I blame it on the wait and the drugs, Lupron. I call it the Lupron Brain. It makes me slightly crazy! HA! That sure is an understatement.

I guess this post is a disclaimer to the rambles. Please forgive me. I just want to tell my story even if it is all over the place.

1 comment:

Iris said...

Life changes us and whether it is the Lupron or the heartbreak or a combination of the two, it has changed you and I wouldn't expect anything different...but you know what? Having known you before that life changing day and knowing you now (especially having seen you this summer) you are different (just as I am sure you think I am different because of my own journey), but the heart of you that I know and love is the same. I can only imagine that it is incredibly difficult. I admire you so much for going out on the line by sharing your journey with those who come across your blog. You could so easily just crawl into that bed of yours and hide under the covers for days and weeks and months, but you get up every day and allow Jesus to carry you through to the next one...and the next one...and the next one. That is a great testament to the rest of us. Thanks for being a blessing. Love you!