Thursday, September 22, 2005

What to Say?

What do you say to people when they ask if you have any kids? What do you say when they ask if you will ever have them?

Infertility is such a secret disease. I think back to the many couples in my life who never had children. I thought they had made that decision and love being without kids. But thinking back I imagine that they just couldn't and were embarrassed and ashamed of it.

Now this disease is coming out in the open more. I have met many people who tried years for their own little miracle. I now know the look in the eye. That far off look of longing. It is the saddest and deepest look.

I hope people open up more and share their dark secret of being childless. If we all come together we will be stronger. I have met so many amazing women online who know just what I am talking about. I have seen many of them have that awful, dreaded week of trying not to get their hopes up and then watching them fall again and again. Some of them are still with me in this crazy journey. Others have moved on to their miracle. But I thank and love each of them for being with me on this journey.

We all just need to say what is in our hearts, "I am waiting for my little miracle in God's perfect timing."


Cristina said...

This is a perfect response, Sunny...I wish I knew of it 3+ years ago...

"I am waiting for my little miracle in God's perfect timing."

I see that look on woman's faces in the grocery stores, shopping malls, dry cleaners...I see the hurt and longing now as I stroll in with my little ones, or my growing belly...I still want to just reach out and hug the women I see and tell them to never give up fight hard in this journey and ask for prayers and support from others...

I'll be praying for you!

Sunny said...

You know it took me a long time to come to that attitude, God's perfect timing. For a long time I fought it and pretended that I had His attitude but I didn't. I was too bitter. Once I let it go it changed my life. I have learned so much through this journey.

I see that you learned loads in yours. Sensitivity! You might not be able to reach out and touch them, you can always say that prayer as you pass them by. God will use you and your past journies one day! You compassion will be so evident that it will give others peace.

Thank you for your prayers and support.