Friday, January 20, 2006

Skipping Church

We are skipping church on Sunday. It is the Sanctity of Human Life Sunday. Guess what that means?

BABIES!!! Baby dedications.

It also means that our pastor will be preaching on The Right To Bear Children as part of his marriage teachings. I am sure he will give loads of wisdom to those who have children but it is too much for my heart.

I always feel stupid for missing these Sunday's. Grumps thinks that I can handle it but I know what I can and can't. When I see pictures of babies or babies being prayed over, it just hurts too much. When someone preaches on the family, I tune out. I begin doodling instead of listening.

One day it will be me and Grumps on the stage with our little miracle, dedicating 'it' to the Lord. I just hope that day is sooner than later. I don't want to have to miss another church service because my heart can't take it anymore.


Jay said...

I would never be able to go to a service like that before my babies. (((hug)))
Sleep in, relax and eat in bed. :)

Sunny said...

That is the plan. :)

kell said...

oh man do i know how you feel. i am the same way. and i have a hard time at 1st b-day parties, baby showers, etc. the heart just aches so badly!

Sunny said...

Man, it so aches.

southern peach said...

I hate that you are going through this! It tugged at my heart to read your blog here...see I know how you feel, and know what you're going through isn't fun. See, I have a condition called Turner's Syndrome, which is a case of a lack of a female chromosome. I have been told that the only way I will conceive is through IVF. Otherwise I will be adopting. I have already had anxieties over this b/c I have always wanted kids.
I will keep you guys in my prayers, and pray that your little comes sooner rather than later! I know I am nowhere near the hurt and pain that you are, but I am here to talk to. I can only imagine what you're going through...Stay strong!

Sunny said...

Thank you S. Peach. You are so sweet. I know it must be hard for you. Just having that hanging over your head and knowing that you can't really do anything about it.

That desire for having kids is just crazy and it only gets stronger when you can't or have to wait or have to try really hard.

THANK YOU again!

snapshots said...

Hugs...and I'm praying.

Sunny said...

Thank you! I am okay. Going to lunch and a movie is more fun anyway. HA!