Thursday, October 25, 2007

Deep Within the Vault

I have been wanting to do this for a long time. Of course being a teacher limits most of any blogging for me. I go on a blogging spree and then onto a dry spell. SO I have decided to make Friday Open Up the Vault Day!

I have 325 published posts and 24 unpublished posts. 24 isn't a lot, neither is 325. BUT there are some thoughts in the vault which no one has seen. Some of those thoughts might only be a title. Others are a sentence or two. Then there are the big posts. Lots of rambling words.

*Disclaimer* many of these posts were written in a very dark time. I have included the date so you can go back to my other posts and put this one into perspective if you would like or not. I am going to start with my first draft post! I have no clue what it will be. It could be STUPID or whatever.

8/16/06 10:43 AM

Our Little One

All there was in the vault of Blogger was a title. I remember writing this. I remember having tears. I needed to just put those words out there into space, onto my monitor, out of my head. I wanted to tell my little one how much I missed 'her'. I was in such pain. I had just had my d&c. All my thoughts were consumed with this title. I couldn't type out any more that day. The title haunted me for weeks. I had too many words, emotions, feelings to put them out for the world to read.

Come back next Friday to enter the vault with me. HA!


Pamela Jeanne said...

Oh Sunny, I got tears just thinking of you typing out those words. I'm glad you're going to share your thoughts. Sometimes it's just good to get them out there. Sending hugs your way for being so brave.

Fertilize Me said...

Thinking of you and praying - I hope that there is healing in vault friday's

DD said...

The title didn't need a post to go with it. Those three words say it it all.

niobe said...

I can see why you couldn't bear to write the post that would have followed that title.

I have 167 draft posts in my vault. None of them will ever see the light of day. Probably.

Amanda said...

I'm with dd...the title says it all. As with everyone else, I hope opening the vault leads to healing. I appreciate that you're sharing with us.


jill said...

Exactly what dd said. Those are three big words. Here's a hug to go with 'em.

tracey said...

I'll bring my flashlight, so when the vault is scary, it'll help us get back out. love you.

Mandy said...

I love the idea of the vault. It is so understandable to have a post like that with only 3 words. I find myself, right now even, having so much emotions, but very few words to express them.

:hugs: and :love:

laura said...

I'm so sorry, I know how these things can creep up on you and surprise you with how bad they make you feel.

I spent much of this week in the hospital w/ my husband, and had a hard time not floating back to those scary weeks in the NICU and stuff.

I look forward to reading your 'vault' posts soon.

The Town Criers said...

That title says a lot as is.

I love this idea. I can't wait for next Friday.

PCOSMama said...

Great idea. Hopefully some healing will come from it.

I too agree that no actual post was needed. The title says it all, knowing what you went through. I imagine that writing the actual post would have been too much to take.