Friday, September 29, 2006

A Blue Week

This week has been a major blue week. I am so over the timed sex, temperature sticking, muscus checking. It hit me that I just wasn't ready for this. I cried the first time we tried this week. Of course I kept it from Grumps. Why should I make him worry?

I thought we were done with all of this.

I could barely keep it together this week. I felt like I was falling apart, unraveling, drowning, and suffocating. The weight was crushing on my chest.

I took baths to relax. I went on walks by myself. I spent time with God. Nothing seemed to really work. It must have been the prayers last night because I woke up finally feeling like me.

At one point this week early in the morning I decided that if we did not have our miracle by my due date we might just have to quit. I am not sure I can continue this roller coaster much longer.

Let's hope and pray that tonight will be the winner shot!

2 comments:

Curly Mommy said...

I'm sorry you are feeling so blue. You are in my prayers.

Sarah said...

I totally understand how you feel. I feel it too. I will keep praying for you. Love you !!